Wednesday

Dad: Letting Go and Moving On Holding You Within my Heart

A year has passed since I was going to shut down Dad's page.  I couldn't do it. But I'm doing it tonight. But I still couldn't quite let go. I had to bring his story over to my blog. I am care manager but I am adult child too. Grief can be complex and it has taken me all of two years to finally let go.

This is the anniversary of what would be my Dad's 31 years of sobriety and what is the second anniversary of his passing I am going to close up this page. I don't know why it took me so long but after awhile it is just kind of strange to see his face here as if he were still an active and alive on Facebook and other places.

I still have his ashes and hopefully late next summer I will make a trip back to Wilson NY and scatter them near the old family cottage...the place where, as a family, we seemed to make the best memories.

I am writing from his old laptop right now. I remember trying in vain to get access to it. I simply could not find the passcode. Many months after his passing...I was ready to give up. I stopped, took a deep breath and asked for his help. A certain phrase came to me. For the heck of it, I put it into the password space and voila, I was in. Go figure.... One of those things that cannot quite be explained. I wrote him this little message and I will end his Facebook career with it.

God bless all of you who are reading this post. I love all of you who have loved him and I close this page tonight with love and gratitude that I had him in my life.

This was my final letter to him when I was trying to crack the code into his laptop....



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